My Mad Fat Diary

I am taking a break from posting about fatshion for a moment so I can discuss this little show called My Mad Fat Diary.  Series 1 premiered early last year on Channel 4 in the UK and has pretty much won the hearts of many and quickly spread throughout the fat positive community on Tumblr (which is how I came across it).

The show takes place in 1996 England with a 16 year old girl who just got out of a psychiatric ward. Rae Earl has some pretty serious mental health issues including issues with anxiety, binge eating, self harm, and suicidal tendencies.  After being released, Rae reconnects with a childhood friend who introduces her to a new group of friends.  Rae has to cope with being out in the world and trying to be normal when she clearly still has a lot of things that she is dealing with, one of which... is being fat.

The show is heavy, in terms of how it (fairly accurately) portrays being mentally ill and having some serious self images issues but the show is also hilarious.  Rae is a charming character who most of the time is just like most teenage girls.  She thinks about boys, sex, and music most of the time and is constantly trying to figure out where she fits in.  She is the most relatable character I have ever seen in terms of what it's like to be a fat teenager.  The show so accurately portrays what it is like to constantly feel like you are being made fun and being talked about because of what your body looks like and how, as someone who is fat, we try and figure out what we do and don't deserve.

Rae's childhood friend, Chloe is this thin pretty girl and it's clear that Rae spent most of her life in this girl's shadow, constantly feeling jealous of the way she looks and the attention she gets because of it.  When I first started watching this show, I related to that so much, even now... at 29 years old, I recall so much of my high school days being jealous of girls who were "prettier" or thinner than I was.  I had friends who would attract boys everywhere we went and I was always the one who sat on the sidelines wondering what it would be like to have guys chase after me.  Even if someone did take an interest in me, I didn't feel like I deserved it because my body wasn't good enough.

This show is so important in terms of fat visibility.  Rae is fun, has hopes and dreams, desires, and is wanted.  And her ability to connect with an audience that relates to her is just beautiful.

Series 2 started this past week and one episode in, the show still had amazing things to offer.  It's laugh out loud hilarious, relatable, sad, and all of the things that me want to continue watching.  I can't wait to see what this new season holds.